The Right Way to Approach the Death of Someone Who Harmed Us (Or Our Ancestors)
It’s been a few days since the death of Queen Elizabeth II was announced. And as one would expect, the topic has been trending on social. Thanks to social media communities (example: #BlackTwitter and #IrishTwitter), many of us have become more aware of the collective and generational trauma experienced around the globe as a result of British colonization during her reign.
This brings up an interesting question: What is the right way to approach the death of someone who has harmed us? Below are a few tips.
If it is a parent or family member:
Forgive them or don’t
Reflect on and express feelings such as sadness or relief
Express wishes for them or don’t think about them at all
Engage in traditional mourning behaviors or celebrate
If it is a public figure: Same as above
The “right” way to approach this situation is whatever way makes sense for a particular person at a particular moment in time.
We are not required to approach death in the same way as others or as tradition dictates.
High-profile deaths often have a way of bringing up all sorts of emotions. And if feelings come up that are tough to deal with despite discussing it on social or with friends, talking with a mental health professional who can provide an inclusive and trauma-informed space might help.
Wishing you comfort.
Art/Image Courtesy of: https://www.etsy.com/shop/CarmenNydiaFineArt