How to Use Humor When Writing a Eulogy

Sep 8

Written By Dr. J

Delivering a eulogy can be one of the most daunting tasks ever faced, especially if the deceased person was close to your heart. But amidst the sadness, there's room to celebrate a person's life in a way that captures their spirit, humor, and the moments that made them uniquely them. If you think they would want humor included in their eulogy, here's how to write a eulogy that is both funny and heartfelt and that strikes a balance between humor and respect.

1. Start with Memories

Begin by jotting down memories, big or small. What are some of the funniest moments you shared? Maybe it was that time they tried to bake a cake and it collapsed, or the holiday where they got lost and it turned into a mini adventure. Remember, it's these anecdotes that capture the essence of the person and will make listeners smile in recognition.

2. Keep It Genuine

Humor in a eulogy is best when it arises from real stories and character traits. Avoid forcing jokes or using generic humor. Think of moments that highlight their quirky habits, innocent blunders, or their unique way of looking at the world.

3. Intersperse with Heartfelt Moments

A eulogy shouldn’t be a stand-up routine. Just as you weave in funny stories, be sure to include touching moments, their virtues, or the lessons they taught. This brings depth and paints a holistic picture of the departed.

4. Watch Your Tone

This is perhaps the most important aspect. The goal is to keep it light without being irreverent. Be aware of sensitive issues, and steer clear of topics that might offend or upset family members and friends.

5. Use Their Own Words

Was there a funny phrase or saying the person often repeated? Incorporate these into the eulogy. It's a touching way to make it feel like they're there with you, sharing in the remembrance.

6. Seek Feedback

Before the final delivery, share the eulogy with a close friend or family member. They can offer perspective, suggest additions, or help fine-tune the balance between humor and heart.

7. Speak from the Heart

When delivering the eulogy, it's okay to be emotional. People understand. Speak from the heart, remember to breathe, and if you fumble, that's okay. Sometimes, the imperfections in delivery make the message even more genuine.

8. End on a Positive Note

Conclude by highlighting their enduring legacy—whether it's the love they spread, the lessons they left behind, or the joy they brought to lives. Leave the listeners with a sense of gratitude for having known such a wonderful person.

In Conclusion

Writing a eulogy is no small task, but it's an honor and a privilege to remember a loved one in this way. As you mix humor with heart, you'll not only help those in attendance find a moment of levity in their grief, but you'll also paint a true-to-life portrait of the departed, capturing the full spectrum of their humanity. Remember, it's all about celebrating a life lived, in all its laughter and love.

Dr. J

Dr. J is a practicing licensed clinical psychologist and a eulogy consultant. Her passion for supporting others during life's most challenging moments is the reason she created The Gift of Eulogy, where she provides eulogy consulting services, including editing, ghost-writing, and coaching.

She earned a doctoral degree in Clinical psychology and completed a Post-Doctoral Fellowship that included hospice/palliative care services. Currently, Dr. J's clinical practice is focused on serving those in need as the director of an award-winning mental health treatment program in a large healthcare system. She has also previously served clients in private practice, providing support to those in need, with a focus on trauma, grief, and loss.

Her experience as an adjunct faculty member teaching college students helped her combine her passion for the field and for teaching. And, as a former training director for a large pre and post doctoral psychology training program, Dr. J is proud of her contributions to the high quality training of our newest generation of mental health professionals.

Dr. J has years of experience speaking and writing. She has presented at numerous conferences and hospitals on a wide range of mental health topics, including suicide risk assessment and management. Her experience as a writing consultant for local and international doctoral students has been incredibly rewarding. Dr. J has also written or developed numerous training manuals, seminars, and workshops over the years and recently authored a chapter related to dementia care in an edited book with Springer.

She can be contacted at info@thegiftofeulogy.com

https://www.thegiftofeulogy.com