Writing A Eulogy: A Step By Step Example

About this Eulogy example

Below you will find each step to writing the eulogy, each section filled in with key information and a brief explanation.

STEP1: EULOGY INTRODUCTION

In this section, we do a few important things:

  1. Greet the audience

  2. Thank the audience

  3. Describe the relationship/introduce the eulogy reader

Good morning friends and family. On behalf of the family, thank you for joining us to share in our sorrow, but also to celebrate the life of Abuelita, who passed away on January 5th, 2021. Abuelita was my neighbor for over 20 years and watched me grow up. More importantly, she was family.  Like many of you, although she and I were not blood related, I called her Abuelita. It means grandmother in Spanish. It was an honor to know her and it is an honor to deliver her eulogy.

sTEP 2: ATTENTION GRABBING STATEMENT, QUESTION, OR POEM

In this section, we start with an attention grabbing statement and attempt to engage the audience in a brief reflection. This can help keep the audience’s attention.

36,524. The number of DAYS in 100 years.

876,582. The number of HOURS in 100 years.

Let’s take a moment now to reflect on the magnitude of the following number: 52,594,920.

(PAUSE)

That is the number of MINUTES in 100 years. Despite their enormity, these numbers cannot capture the depth of her remarkable life - one that spanned 100 years, lived between countries and cultures in Cuba, Puerto Rico, and the United States. 

STEP 3: BRIEF BACKGROUND

In the background section, we briefly mention a few important things. We avoid getting into too much detail about where she went to school, jobs she had, etc, since 100 years is a lot to cover. Instead, we highlight some key accomplishments and successes in her life that demonstrate who she was.

When people hear that Abuelita lived to be 100, there is often a pause, filled with amazement. I honor her today by sharing a few highlights from her awe-inspiring journey of 100 years. 

Abuelita’s journey began in the town of Baracoa in Cuba. She was born to a poor in money and rich in love family. Life must have been very difficult at times. After all, she witnessed and experienced…

The rise of communism.

The Cuban Missile Crisis.

Extreme poverty.

And leaving her parents and homeland for the unknown.

Yet, she persevered and continued on her journey. She went on to live in Puerto Rico and later in New York City, where she met her husband Miguel. They built a life and legacy together, raising three children and establishing a foundation to help children living in poverty. She is survived by her children Lissette and Pedro, as well as her many grandchildren and great grandchildren.

STEP 4: HER MOST IMPORTANT ATTRIBUTES

In this section, we highlight some of the attributes that made her special.

When I think of her, I see strength, courage, independence, and perseverance. In order to survive the ups and downs in this ever-changing world, she had to learn to adapt. And she did. Although life was tough at times, her spirit remained strong. That strong spirit not only survived, but showed a sense of kinship and care for others. For example, when she lived next door, she ALWAYS shared some cafecito con pan Cubano (Cuban coffee with Cuban bread) with us. Her kind spirit was even present when we went out to a traditional Cuban restaurant.

STEP 5: STORY

In the story section, we briefly tell a story that has some lighthearted-ness to it. This can help keep the audience engaged and connected to who she was - it may even help them connect with their own memories of her. The story can bring her to life in that moment.

We've all had this experience… you are at a restaurant with friends or family and the bill arrives. You all start fighting over who will pay! My little sister and I saw this regularly at our weekly Cuban restaurant outings with Abuelita. We would sneak around to try to snatch the bill and deliver it to our mom. Why did we do that as children? We grew up knowing that generosity and hospitality through paying for meals was an honor. In our shared cultures, paying shows you value your relationship with the person. As you can guess, Abuelita always won that fight!

I know we will be reunited one day and I will invite her to a meal at a Cuban restaurant. But this time, I will pay the bill!

STEP 6: CLOSING COMMENTS

In the last step to writing the eulogy, we do three things:

  1. We connect the end to how we started, again with an attention grabbing statement

  2. We say good-bye to her and acknowledge we will miss her

  3. We close by expressing our wish that we all learn from her and embrace her positive qualities in our own lives

We will miss her so much, but we also celebrate her long and remarkable life.

(PAUSE)

1,200. That is the number of months in 100 years. In some ways, 100 years doesn't seem as long when we think about it in months. 

May we all have Abuelita’s same strength, courage, and perseverance to make the very best of the months in our own journeys - however many they may be.


We hope you found this helpful.

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Dr. J

Dr. J is a practicing licensed clinical psychologist and a eulogy consultant. Her passion for supporting others during life's most challenging moments is the reason she created The Gift of Eulogy, where she provides eulogy consulting services, including editing, ghost-writing, and coaching.

She earned a doctoral degree in Clinical psychology and completed a Post-Doctoral Fellowship that included hospice/palliative care services. Currently, Dr. J's clinical practice is focused on serving those in need as the director of an award-winning mental health treatment program in a large healthcare system. She has also previously served clients in private practice, providing support to those in need, with a focus on trauma, grief, and loss.

Her experience as an adjunct faculty member teaching college students helped her combine her passion for the field and for teaching. And, as a former training director for a large pre and post doctoral psychology training program, Dr. J is proud of her contributions to the high quality training of our newest generation of mental health professionals.

Dr. J has years of experience speaking and writing. She has presented at numerous conferences and hospitals on a wide range of mental health topics, including suicide risk assessment and management. Her experience as a writing consultant for local and international doctoral students has been incredibly rewarding. Dr. J has also written or developed numerous training manuals, seminars, and workshops over the years and recently authored a chapter related to dementia care in an edited book with Springer.

She can be contacted at info@thegiftofeulogy.com

https://www.thegiftofeulogy.com
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Eulogy For a Friend Sample